I love my friends. I don’t have a lot of friends, but the few friends I have are amazing folks. I love them lots. I want them to know that.

Rog, I love you. You and I hit it off right away, and I think it’s because we have gone through similar things in our lives. We related to each other quickly, and without having to say too much. We knew where each other was coming from. We feed off each other and have total kick-ass fun when we get together not giving a shit of consequences and what other people think. Plus, to boot, you are wickedly evil. I love you.

Jo, I love you. You’re funny, and twisted, and imaginative. I am glad that someone who I despise brought you into my work life, and that it’s gone beyond that. I wasn’t in a happy place when you arrived, I didn’t like the fact you were brought in to “clean up” after some great people were let go. I didn’t want to like you. But like Roger, you hit a nerve and we quickly hit it off. And it’s cool that you and Roger knew each other before I knew either of you. What a small world. I feed off your creativity and wittiness. I need to use my brain more, and you are helping me rediscover my artistic side. You are waking a dormant side of me that has been asleep in me since my aunt died, over three years ago! I love you.

Morg, I love you. You helped me in many more ways than I can say. You have this energy about you that I absorb. I feed off of the majorly positive aura that makes you glow. You energize me when I am around you, and I am super happy to have you in my life. just being around you makes me happy. You’ve changed my life. I began to look at life differently when I met you, and began not to take it so seriously. I grew down. I was scared of you when I first met you, as I am when I meet other guys who I am attracted to. I didn’t want you to not like me for who and what I am. A lot of guys are like that, but you are so not like other guys. I fell for you hard, and I continue to deal with the fact I will never have you. You are the love of my life, you know this, but you’re still around. That’s so cool. I love you.

I love all of you and want to let you know this.

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My Current Favourite Dish: Scott Neal (really cute actor from UK-Beautiful Thing)
Current Addiction: Nothing Fails by Madonna
In the DVD Player: Beautiful Thing (wonderful little movie from England)
In the CD Player: My Friends by the Red Hot Chili Peppers (an oldie from the underappreciated album, One Hot Minute)
On the Tube: Big Brother is on again (YEAH)

I started out my weekend fairly well. I went for supper with Dad, Diane and my sister. We went to this new place called On Tap, the service sucked and the food was barely okay for what we paid.

Then I headed out to the Flatland Music Festival to hear some really bad music and drink expensive coolers. At least it was free, and I got to hang out with my best friend, his fiancé and her aunt. Later on that evening Morg and I went for a drive to Regina Beach. We walked around and found a pizza place that was open late. We were feeling nostalgic, reminiscing about when times were easier and simpler. Ah, youth.

Saturday I felt like absolute shit and didn’t get out of bed until 5:30 in the afternoon. When I did crawl out of bed I was throwing up all night. Sunday I felt better, but didn’t do too much, although I did get a new pair of shoes.

Monday, and it’s another day at work. Morgan called me before lunch to tell me the wedding is off. On Sunday night, Suzanne told him she isn’t happy anymore and they decided to work on their relationship rather than going through a possible divorce. Later on Monday afternoon, they were talking and trying to sort out what is going on, and she said if it was meant to be they will get back together, as she is walking out the door. So much for her making any effort.

Morg gave me a call right after she left. So I went over to his place, put him in my truck, and took him for a drive. He needed to vocalize some of his feelings and get some stuff out of his system. I could tell he kept a lot of stuff inside. He really needed to cry, but didn’t want to in front of me, I think.

He is sooo in love with her, and I don’t think she really loved him. She loved the idea of having a gorgeous man on her arm as a trophy and now that she knows that she could have him in all the ways a person can have someone, she tossed him and is moving onto some other guy. She is his whole world, all the friends they hang out with are her friends, everywhere they went they went are her places, etc. He has no one at the moment, but really he does.

I drove him to a place that my dad used to take me when I was a kid. Indians used the place to hunt buffalo and drove them over the cliff. We hiked into the bush and climbed all over the little gorge in the valley. I got really dirty and bloody, as did Morg, but I think he really needed to get out and do this. He’s never been there and he wants to go back during the day sometime.

On the way home the music in the CD player was just twisting him up inside. “Good Riddance” by Greenday, “A Day in the Life” by the Beatles, “Bring Me To Life” by Evanescence, and it seemed to get worse song by song. He was really quiet.

I dropped him off at his apartment and told him that if he didn’t want to stay there, he can use the spare room at my place. He said he will be fine.

I tried calling him last night to see how he is doing. I got his machine and left a little message to let me know how he is. I’m worried, he was in bad shape on Monday night when I picked him up.

I get a lot of energy off my friends and family, and feed off of it. I am not feeling very good today, so I think Morg is not doing too good at all. I feel so sorry for him, I know how much he loves her. It’s going to take a really long time for him to get over this. I told him I’m available if he needs to talk, cry, yell, scream, vent, etc., or if he needs to get away.

I just want to know how he’s doing.

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My Current Favourite Dish: Scott Neal (really cute actor from UK-Beautiful Thing)
Current Addiction: Nothing Fails by Madonna
In the DVD Player: Beautiful Thing (wonderful little movie from England)
On the Tube: Big Brother is on again (YEAH)